How new choices can change old responses
Choices give us flexibility and the opportunity to respond to situations in different ways. The more choices we have, the more likely we are to behave in ways that we are really happy with.
Adding choices can happen in a couple of ways. Sometimes it’s about learning new skills, such as new ways to respond to a difficult situation, and sometimes it’s about taking existing skills and applying them to new situations. Often we have huge numbers of internal resources which we could apply to a given situation, but we have never thought of doing so.
Often we find ourselves behaving in ways we are not entirely happy with. We may wish to eat healthier foods but find ourselves reaching for chocolate. We may have difficulties with a colleague but always find ourselves at a loss for words instead of standing up for ourselves. Adding in new choices means old behaviours may no longer be chosen by the unconscious as they’re no longer the best choice. When you have new ways to relax, feel good, or fill in your time, chocolate may no longer be such an appealing option, and when you have new ways to put forward your views, remain resourceful in challenging situations and respond to others, you’ll finally be able to communicate in the way you really want to.
Discovering new choices occurs naturally all the time. Coming across new ideas on the radio or television, reading, observing others, and finding out about how other people do things all lead to our worlds expanding. With that expansion comes knowledge about possibilities of how we could be reacting to the world. Some of those possibilities will be suitable for us and some not, but with each possibility comes potential for a new choice, and greater resources.